hear the army

despite my promises, i haven’t been so good at waiting this time -better, but i honestly don’t know how women don’t tell people. despite the looks when you don’t order a drink at the bar…how do you explain canceling plan after plan and just sleeping every moment you’re not working or eating? or that you have to find somewhere to curl up for 1/2 of your lunch break cause you are ready to pass out or vomit? or going to the toilet every 2 mins? i dunno but my hat’s off to all the women who do.

here i am, pregnant again within the first 1/2 of the year. i count myself lucky. though i was at 10 weeks, the little guy never made it past the size of about 6 and the heart never started beating. waiting for the inevitable was probably the worst for me and i must admit if that’s what kind of pain i’m looking forward to magnified by another 30 weeks, well – i’m not even sure if i’m up to the job! but here i am…

and things are looking up this time! i should be 9.5 weeks now and we checked at 8 weeks and all was good – heart beating away and all! i was so so relieved to see that but now that i don’t have to go in again for another month all i want to do is run to the clinic and have them check to be sure everything is okay. the first day i’m not tired, nauseous, or my boobs don’t ache i panic. i’m not qualified to speak on the latter but i’m pretty well convinced that the first 3 months of pregnancy are the hands down worst. you can’t embrace it but you can’t disregard it either.

so, if a girlfriend turns lame all of a sudden, stops wanting to go out to smoky places (oh the smell of tobacco!), wants to be in bed by 10pm or earlier, or doesn’t want to go where everyone is drinking and doesn’t have any news at all to talk about (i mean, how are you to come up with good conversation when the only thing you think about is your pregnancy but you’re not supposed to talk about it)…don’t just figure she’ll call when she’s ready or she’s blowing you off. she’s either wickedly depressed or pregnant. either way, she needs you. call her – ask how she’s doing, offer to come over for a movie night (her boobs are swollen and she’s bloated, nothing looks good enough to leave the house) – you’ll be her heroine or hero. and she might even need a shoulder to cry on if it doesn’t work out.