fuck pcos
this was the title of a recently encountered blog on the web. i can relate.
since i stopped the pill in november i have been blessed with many of the symptoms all over again. as i read her blog i was amazed that she has the gall to post all of these unsightly things up there for everyone to see (as you know i password protected this post). sometimes when it gets too much, i have to vent to my husband cause i really don’t have any girlfriends here i feel close enough to do it with. subsequently scolding myself for the lapse in judgment. and when you do vent to friends/family they just assume you’re exaggerating.
i finally swore to took action at all costs (literally and figuratively). i signed up for laser hair removal and was ready to pay the price. unfortunately my appointment arrived finally (long wait list) when i’d scored a “good” on fertility friend for intercourse timing and was a few days late. just in case i thought to inquire – is laser okay even if you’re pregnant? and they went into a tizzy and told me i couldn’t do it until i was sure i wasn’t pregnant. might stress the baby. do they realize how much stress there is in having to shave your face daily (sometimes twice) because you can’t pluck if you want the laser to work!?! of not allowing your husband to touch your face for fear one will poke his finger!?!
this has been my last week. i got sick after leaving their office and haven’t mended since. slept 15 hours yesterday. the limbo…can’t get excited cause i don’t know if i am pregnant yet (and can’t test), sickly but not sure why, can’t take cold medicine, get hair removal, even drink to ease the pain cause of the possibility.
i guess if pcos doesn’t kick you one way (being barren) it will in another.