hear the army

Wow – it’s over! All of that preparation and stress and I can barely remember what happened for nerves and the rush of it all. I’ll tell you what I can recall:

Isseki and I arrive at the venue, The Garden Oriental Soshuen Kobe, at noon on a partly cloudy afternoon after a week of rain forecasts and an entire day of rain the day before. We are whisked into a back room and instructed to get into a spa type (part towel, part tube dress) gown in front of everyone. Quickly the two hair/make girls go to work on me – rolling my hair and covering me in makeup from my paws to my mane – never have I seen so much makeup! As they transform me into a flawless, tatooless, glittering bride, poor Isseki waits in a chair until the dress/tuxedo lady arrives. He’s ready in 10 mins and looks SO handsome in his tuxedo! Meanwhile they are instructing me to get into my gown right in front of him – but, uh, er…the lady with the stopwatch is checking in, “photos in 2”. I decide this isn’t the time to try and explain my cultural norms to 5 people and do it. 😮

1:30 we’re Soshuen’s signature garden for pre-wedding photos. Isseki is made to stand on a couple of blocks to match my heel height! Friends & family have started to mingle about making me giddy and embarrassed – is that the stuff of the “bridal glow” ?

2 and it’s into the chapel for a warp speed rundown of what we do during the ceremony. “Turn inwardly to face the crowd every time. Take off gloves then, face each other now, face me after, turn to your mother then, etc.” Mom and I have one chance to synchronize her kimono steps with my wedding dress strides. We introduce our families to each other and it’s back outside to let the guests enter.

2:30 the ceremony begins. Everyone’s nervous including the ring boy who almost gives everyone a heart attack when he looses his footing at a step over a drain grate, rings in hand! All is safe though, Mom & I cross our fingers, hope not to tumble over our respective garments, and enter the chapel.

I couldn’t look at anyone’s face and when I looked into Isseki’s gorgeous eyes during the vows I was sure I would burst into a fit of giggles or tears at any second. Would you believe the preacher was from North Carolina? Yes indeed. Despite his odd Japanese accent that also put us on the verge of laughter, he was kind, and agreed to leave out the part where he used Jesus dying on the cross as a metaphor for true love. Yikes. Not in my wedding you don’t. Isseki’s vows were in Japanese and mine in English. Heidi said my bouquet was shaking like a leaf but that’s only because it was quite heavy to hold up in one hand for a long period of time! I thought I’d never get the cute satin gloves off and on again due to the amount of moisture they had absorbed during that stressful time!!

We departed the chapel for pictures again in the garden, but with the whole crew this time! There was a family in the 2nd floor meeting room, obviously thinking about conducting a wedding there also, who took great pleasure in watching and waving to us – I hope we sold a wedding that day!

Back to the little room to freshen up before the big entrance to the reception. We’re briefed by the stopwatch lady (SL) once more, the horns from Dean Martin’s “Ain’t Love a Kick in the Head” sound, and we move through the doors. The uncomfortable standing still, smiling, waiting, is it okay to go now? I have no idea if the reception even started on schedule but I felt like we were behind schedule the whole time. We finally get a look at the cake that caused such a fuss – Isseki can’t eat any kind of cream. “A wedding cake with no cream? What could we possibly do then? We’ve never been asked that before!” They made a chocolate substitute that was delicious but not as spectacular as you would think a wedding cake would be. In the seconds before the cutting the SL gave us instructions that I could barely hear and Isseki didn’t have time to translate. “Just cut straight through the middle?”
“Yeah”
So we plunge into the cake as bulbs are flashing, etc. and about ½ way through the knife just stops. Uh…ok, push harder…urrrrgh…not moving…ppuuussshhh…oh no!I’m grunting in front of the camera – smile! About that time I realize there is a board between the 2 layers of cake and we were only supposed to cut through the top layer!! Doh.

We introduce each other, and then Vanessa kicks off the toast with a lovely speech. The food starts pouring in as the MC questions us about how we met, the proposal, etc. Then my sister gives a heartwarming speech about love and Takemoto-kun (25m guitarist) gets up to do the first public speaking he’s ever done. I’m so impressed that he tries to do it without reading his notes, but still has to refer every now and then. He makes me all nostalgic and teary recalling the 2nd time Isseki and I met in Shinjuku – letting me in on some things Isseki said about me – and admiring the love we show for each other. Then they tell me it’s time for me to sing! Gulp – but wait, I’ve only had a couple sips of champagne! I do it anyway and thank god I can barely hear myself over the band behind me. I find it impossible to look at the guests and instead ground myself by watching Isseki enjoying it all. Next it’s his turn and, being the professional singer, he puts on a fantastic show that everyone including me loves!

Then it’s out the door (leaving all our food untouched) to what would be a dress change in most Japanese weddings, but I opt for the more practical hair change only. My hair is taken down, a flower popped in, crystals are replaced by pearls, flowers tied to my arm, the gloves given to my by my Aunt and Mom the day before, and its back to the doors for another briefing. They also decide this is a good time to let us know that one of our CD’s (we created 2 cds, one with a specific song for each event, the other for filler music and dropped them off ½ a week ahead so there would be time to fix any issues) won’t play the whole way through and is skipping! “Uh, ok, so what do you want us to do now?” The doors open “[whistle] yeah”. This was the time planned to socialize with our guests a bit and have a group photo, but with the SL lady behind us it turned into a stop, pose, move on…which Isseki’s Grandmother didn’t take too seriously as she grabbed me to pull off my glove and let his Aunt see the rings! I’m being pulled by the SL on one end and by Grandmother on the other!!

Then we sit again, “now you can eat”. Whew, I pick up my fork to dig in…”ok, stand up!”. What!?! “Bouquet pull!” We give every single girl there a ribbon that’s wrapped around the bouquet in my hand and everyone gives a tug but only one ribbon is actually connected to the bouquet! Saves from shy people ducking out of a toss and any possible injuries. Mio, Isseki’s sister closest in age to him, is the lucky girl! But, we already knew she and her boyfriend were thinking about marriage! 😉 Then the garter – which has never been done at this venue before either – we kept it tactful though and Isseki’s friend, Kanseki, was the lucky guy!

Then they move our parents to the doors opposite the room from us and I do the custom of reading my Mom a letter from me. It’s not long before thinking about all she’s done for me in my life, and continues to do, makes me blubber and I think everyone else got teary too! I somehow make it through and we head over and give each of our Mom’s a bouquet of flowers. Next, Isseki’s Father says some very sweet words making me so proud of both my current and new family. It’s back through the doors where we line up with our parents for everyone to say goodbye personally. Isseki hands out the last of the 3 gifts for the guests (in Japan it’s bad luck to give only 2 gifts) and I give the ladies some flowers to take home (except, of course, those leaving in a day or two). We still haven’t eaten a thing since breakfast and it’s now almost 6pm. Exhausting. They brought at least our entrée dish and a slice of cake to the little room for us to eat after changing.

Into a taxi to unload and change at home while he waits – then off to the after party at Kim’s (25m bassist) new place. Poor Isseki ends up hosting the entire thing himself (how did this happen!?!) but does a fantastic job of it just the same. I am just no good at these events and feel like I didn’t get to spend quality time with any one person because there were so many people there I wanted to chat with!! We’re finally home around 2am completely knackered. Up again at 7am to meet friends for breakfast before they have to leave town. It was a Helluva day. 😉

Big THANK YOUs to all of you who came to be with us that day, all of you who sent your love from afar, all of you who worked hard to make the day more special (especially those who did lovely speeches: Vanessa, Heidi, Takemoto; the band who learned, practiced, and performed our songs with us: Kakusei (drums), Yokoyama (guitar), Liao (violin), Kim (bass), Kozue (background vocals for Isseki); Yokoyama again for helping us realize our design vision and printing our invitations and the after party maps; Kinoto for being the most handsome ring boy ever; Jungim for helping my Mom wear a kimono for the first time; and Dave for taking time out from the festivities to film everything so my Dad and Grandmothers can enjoy the day even though they weren’t able to come).